I’ve been in a holding pattern of vagueness and ambiguity. The auction house in Dallas which provides me with the lion’s share of my meager income (allowing me to live this rather carefree wastrel lifestyle) is currently working on brokering a large acquisition. If it happens, I might be asked to travel to Dallas to help catalogue, research, etc. Or not. But as this punctuated gig has been so lucrative, I feel a need to be able to jump when called.

I had wanted to run my own team for the San Antonio 48 Hour Film Experience, but there was no way I could commit to the responsibility of contacting crew and actors. However, two different teams contacted me to help out. But even being a crew member on another team was something I didn’t want to commit to. Okay, so that now it’s looking like there’s no Dallas work this week, I’m wondering, do I want to throw myself into a stressful weekend? And if so, on which team? I mean, there might be some local jackass on one of these teams–you know, some guy or gal with whom I’d never work with were I getting paid. That’s sting, you know, suddenly I find myself with one of these clowns…working for free.

I’m conflicted.

Anyway, today I did make commitments to two other free video gigs this week. Thursday I’m out at URBAN-15 working on a tech run involving their new TriCaster (an impressive piece of production hardware developed here in San Antonio by NewTek). It’ll be a two camera shoot. I suspect I’ll place my DVX on sticks and feed it’s signal, via s-video, into the TriCaster up in the A/V booth of the URBAN-15 performance space. There will also be a feed from a wall-mounted robot camera which can be shifted and zoomed from a joy stick. I’d better get there early, because I think I’m expected to run all this myself.

And on Friday, I’ll be video-taping the First Friday performance at Jump-Start Performance Space. They’re doing a Christmas burlesque show in the window of their theater. It should be pretty good, seeing as they have quite a few sexy company members.

Speaking of Jump-Start, I just received my email invitation to be part of their annual performance party. The Jump-Start company is a tight and rather incestuous clique. I am in awe of most all of them. The work which comes out of Jump-Start is, in my opinion, rather uneven. But, hands down, this is one of the few places in the city where true art happens. Jump-Start is the crown jewel of theater in San Antonio. It pushes boundaries, it is inclusive, and it is clearly aware of what is happening in the community. The mere fact that people there know who I am is exciting. And that they are aware of my work and find it of value, that’s pretty sweet.

So, I guess I need to make a short film in December. My idea is a faux newscast. My maximum runtime is 7 minutes. I think I want to use it all. I guess I’d better start working on a script.

And then I have recently been made aware that I’m part of Payan y Pocha’s “Rudos y Tecnicos: a Lucarrific San Antonio Extravaganza.” It’s a Mexican wrestler performance piece which will take place in the back courtyard of Gallista Gallery, where a real wrestling ring will be set up. This is what happens when I tell people “maybe” when they ask me for something. There are quite a few folks who know that when I say “maybe” I mean “no.” Oh, well. No huge problem here. I’m very found of Victor and Sandra (AKA, Payan y Pocha). And even though I am no performer, I guess it won’t kill me to put on a Mexican wrestling mask and come up with some sort of shtick. I’ve got until Dec. 11. There had been some talk of, um, having me as some sort of Lucha Santa. Obviously because I’m so fat. This is actually when I turned on my “um, well, let’s say MAYBE,” reaction. I mean, wouldn’t you? But there is something rather appealing about being the worst and most villainous asshole, who just happens to be Santa Claus…wearing a Mexican wrestler mask.The problem is that I can only offer my obesity. I’m no actor.

We’ll see. I’ll have to give this some thought.